3 Years

It’s funny how many of our phrases about life have to do with transportation- we’re on the right path, at a crossroads, off the rails.  We’re in the fast lane, bypassing failure, in a rut. We’re enjoying the ride, flying solo, living on autopilot. And the list just goes on.

Three years ago, I didn’t need a metaphor. I had literally taken an unexpected turn that had left my world somewhat literally upside down and my plans figuratively shattered into slivers.  I don’t want to go into the details of the accident here, (if you’re curious, you can read about it in my post What Remains, which also has the open letter I wrote to the Honda Car Company the next day. Warning: there are pictures of the car after the accident in that post) because as each year passes, I try to spend more time looking forward than looking back.

The first anniversary of the accident, I was afraid to drive anywhere.  I sat at home and enjoyed the fact that I was alive.  The legal aftermath of the accident had been settled just weeks before, and I finally felt free to move on.

The second anniversary, I thought (and posted, see above) about how the accident had changed my life for the worse. I have to take more precautions with my back muscles, I flinch more when someone does something unexpected on the road, and I worry more when someone else is behind the wheel.  But dwelling on those things isn’t doing anyone any good, least of all me, so I decided to spend the next year looking forward.

I guess I succeeded, because I totally forgot that it was July 16th today.  I spent the day working with new coworkers, replanning my monthly budget to reflect my recent pay raise (YAY!!! But that’s another post), washing the car with a couple of six-year-olds, and filming scenes for a web series.  I did the things that make me feel happy and fulfilled, rather than spending my time contemplating the fragility of life and how lucky I am to be sitting here in front of my computer today.

I suppose that’s the ultimate sign that I’m over the accident.  It’s never on my mind unless I’m having back pains and have to explain why to someone.  I drive past the accident site without cringing now, and some days I don’t even notice it at all.  It’s just another intersection, although it is somewhat pleasing to see that the two perfect black circles from the impact of my hubcaps on the road are still there.

So this year, I’m only thinking about the accident for as long as it takes me to finish this post.  Then I’m going back to what makes me happy, which tonight is working with an amazing group of actors to make something that is truly funny.

Maybe by next year, I won’t need a post at all.

Life As A Ball Pit, or Beginning of March

I woke up this morning half-dreaming about building a giant ball pit. (Bear with me, this story is going somewhere.)  We all remember those square pens of netting and foam-encased steel, lined with a trampoline and containing hundreds of pieces of the most perfect childhood ammunition since the paper airplane- the hollow plastic ball.

The hollow plastic ball was a wonder of safety engineering.  Its brightly-colored exterior was soft enough to not dent a child’s skull, while its empty innards made sure that no matter how much force you put behind it, that throw was not going to make it to the end of the pit, let along clean through your younger brother’s head.  There was never a less throwing-friendly ball invented.

Sorry Mr. Ryan- even you couldn't get one of these things across the plate.

However, even all the brains of the adult generation couldn’t compare with the ingenuity of blood-thirsty children.  It didn’t take long to figure out that those soft plastic hollow balls provided more molding opportunities than a new cup of play-dough.  A grip of the fingers, and that ball morphed from a perfect sphere with the flight capability of an obese emu into a canoe-shaped weapon of mass eye-putting-out destruction. (Bonus points if you found the stress line and got the plastic to split open at one end.)  You still couldn’t take your younger brother permanently out of commission, but you could sure teach him a thing or two about breaking your favorite toy pony. (Sorry- getting a bit personal here.)

All in all, the ball pit was an excellent place to learn a thing or two about the real world (See? I told you there was a point).  Think about it for a minute.  You show up at the entrance, all excited to play and make friends, and then someone hurls an oblong piece of plastic at your face.  You have two choices: duck and cover, or stand up and fight.  You could try to crawl through the balls along the bottom of the pit and grab your enemy’s leg, jerking them down to your level among the contents of a hundred children’s pockets and the occasional lost sneaker.  Or you could grab your own ammunition (it’s a BALL pit after all.  Running out of ammo is an impossibility) and defend your right to play with the big kids.

Paying student loans off, or really paying any kind of debt off, is like being stuck inside a giant ball pit for the duration.  You show up, all flush with excitement at the wads of cash in your pocket/ new degree in your hand, and the loan company hurls a promissory note at your face.  You have two choices: sneak around and try to pull them down to your level, or stand up and fight.  Either way, just remember that no one’s mom is going to call them to come eat their chicken nuggets.  You dove into the ball pit- now make sure you have an exit strategy.

 

The money stuff.

Beginning of March

$10,980.16 (end of February balance)

– $658 (initial March payment)

+ $??? (March interest)

– $??? (Secondary March payment)

—————–

A balance under $10,200, with any luck.

 

 

For the morbidly curious: Where I Should Be

$11,530.13 (amount owed at beginning of January)

+ $307.41 (accrued interest)

-$961 (January payment)

———

$10,876.54 (end of January balance)

+$110.03 (rough interest for February)

– $961 (February payment)

——-

$10,025.57 (End of February balance)

 

I am $954.59 off where I should be going into March. Essentially, one full payment behind.  The good news is that I might have some extra money coming my way this month from babysitting jobs, if everything goes according to plan.  I know that each month I talk about making a second payment, but so far it hasn’t happened.  I’m going to try really hard to change that this month and boost that payment into the $800 range.  Mainly because I have to beat Amanda, who has accepted my Amazing Loan Race challenge.  But also because I’m an adult and I can’t throw hollow plastic balls at those who stand in my way anymore.

 

At least, not literally.

In Which I Throw Down The Metaphorical Gauntlet

In every movie set in medieval times, it’s a certainty that someone is going to issue a challenge to someone else by hurling a metal-plated glove (gauntlet, for the uninitiated) in the challengee’s general direction.  In the good movies, the challenger slaps the other with the gauntlet.  In the mediocre movies, they throw it at the challengee’s feet.  In the bad movies, this scene gets left on the cutting room floor.  But in any case, when the gloves come off, you know it’s a pivotal moment.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have reached that pivotal moment.

If you’re interested, Amanda’s blog can be read here: http://artofcombiningrandomness.blogspot.com/

See?  I told you this could get interesting.  (Hit the like or share buttons if you agree.)

January: Part I

I’ve called this January: Part I because it’s the beginning of the month and I have no idea where it will end, financially speaking.  I thought I’d talk a bit more about my plan for this…(what’s a suitable word for what I’m doing?  Quest?  Folly?  Adventure?  Descent into darkness?  I’ll have to come back to that. If you know of a good one, please feel free to share it in the comments section.)

First off, I realize that this… undertaking (?) requires the use of a strict budget.  For that, I’m using the Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University model.  I took this course about 4 years ago when I was in college, and it has served me very well.  When you’re like me and paid via hourly wage, it’s very hard to find a workable budget model.  The FPU has one.  Basically, you write out all your expenses each month and their associated costs (rent/ mortgage, insurance, food, clothing, entertainment funds, shoes for poor children in Africa, etc.).  Next, you organize those expenses into priorities (is food more important than seeing the newest Russell Brand flick?  Do we really need to put gas in the car or can we just hitch the family German Shepherd to the kids’ sled?)  Then, you write out how much money you actually made that month (for me, this averages around the $1500 mark).  Finally, you run your finger down the prioritized list and draw a line where the money runs out.  And you stick to that line.  (Trust me on this- it sounds scary, but there is no greater joy than telling a bill collector that they are “below the line this month.”  I’ve done it- it’s awesome.  The poor little buggers get all flustered.)

My major priorities are:

1) Tax (because as a consultant, that doesn’t come out of my paycheck.)

2) Living expenses (roof over the head, gas in the car, power turned on, etc.)

3) Eppy (the pet rabbit.  She has to have proper rabbit food or else she eats the carpet.)

4) Entertainment (Ramsey’s very clear on this- leaving this piece out will make you blow your budget quicker than anything else.  I get $30 a month.  That goes a long way when you’re a discount card hoarder like me.)

5) Student Loans

Now, you may be wondering what I’ve put student loans at the bottom of the list.  After all, isn’t paying them off the whole reason I’m writing this blog?  Yes.  Yes it is.  However, living on a budget doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice all the good.  It just means keeping track of where every dollar goes and making sure each amount is reasonable.  TAlso, the order of my priorities doesn’t reflect the percentage of my income that goes to each.  That list would read something like this:

1) Tax (20%)

2) Living expenses (30%)

3) Eppy (a measly 1%)

4) Entertainment (2%)

5) Student Loans (47%)

So while it’s last on the priority list, I am transferring roughly 47% of my income each month via online bill pay (.25% off my interest rate for doing so, btw.  Every fraction of a cent helps.) to a company who only knows my name when I’m behind on payments.  Man, personal responsibility sucks.

One final note- those of you who had a calculator handy might have noticed that I said my monthly income averages around the $1500 mark.  I then said that I send 47% of that to the loan company.  In my first post, I said my monthly payment goal was $961.  47% of $1500 is NOT $961.  It’s $705.  Where is that extra $251 going to come from, you ask?

Therein lies the adventure.

Also, anyone need a babysitter?  I come cheap.

What it’s all about/ New Year’s Resolution

I am 25 years old, I work five jobs, and I am $78,231 in debt.  Yep, you read that right.  At 25 years old, I owe almost 80k.  But before you get all “credit cards are evil & you should know better” on me, let me say this- not a cent of that is credit card debt.  I don’t use credit cards.  Rather, that impressive total is the cost of my undergrad and graduate education.

I’m not complaining here (well, maybe I am a little), because I made the choice to go to private universities and I made the choice to take on the loans.  I made those choices because I thought that furthering my education would result in a better job once I graduated.  Hang on a sec.

HA!  HA HA HA!

Ok.  So I fell for that one hook, line and sinker.  I now hold a Master’s degree from a very reputable university in a very reputable field, and a Bachelor’s degree from a small but still reputable college in another very reputable field.  I also hold five part-time jobs while those reputable degrees get left off my resume.  (True story, btw- I left my Master’s degree off my resume so I could get a job.  Twice.)

Despite this, I’m still willing to own up to my debt and do my best to pay it back.  Like I said, I took the chance on my education, and just because I didn’t end up with what I wanted doesn’t mean I don’t have to take responsibility.  So that’s what I’m doing this year.  I’m taking responsibility.

My graduate loans (totaling $66,697, and oh how I love the demonic significance in that) are currently in a holding pattern.  Apparently, I don’t make enough at my five part-time jobs (imagine that!) to be held to a minimum payment.  So, I’m going to pay $50 a month to that company to keep the interest down, and otherwise just ignore them til next year.

My undergraduate loans (totalling $11,533) are in repayment.  This means the company wants their money back, and they wanted it yesterday.  This year, they’re going to get it all back.

That’s right- my goal this year is to repay all $11,533 plus interest back by December 31st, 2012.  This means a monthly payment of roughly $961, or for those of you keeping track at home- nearly 50% of my monthly income.  Yep- this is going to be a fun year.

Each month, I’ll post how much I paid, what the new balance is, and perhaps an interesting story about why I’m $700 short that month.  Feel free to follow me- it should be a fun and increasingly desperate ride.